girl love.

readers, stalkers, jealous bitches
friends, Romans, countrymen
lend me your ears:

Gala posted a wonderful article that i shared in my Google Reader when it was first published. it's all about jealousy, competition, and nastiness between women. on the flip side, it was also a description of happiness removed from the existence of anyone but oneself.

i've been thinking about girl love a bit recently. when i was younger, i was bullied--ALOT. girls hated me, cut my hair, were nasty to me, tried to hit me, etc. and i didn't do anything to deserve it. i never did anything to cross them. i never looked for a fight. i pretty much stayed in my Francine Pascal's Fearless books and listened to *NSYNC [shut up]. at the time, it made me miserable and confused that these girls hated me so much, but now i've since chalked it up to jealousy.

and it's hilarious, because in my mind, i had nothing to be jealous of! the other girls were the ones with all of the friends and name-brand clothes! funny, funny, funny.

clearly it doesn't take a genius to fake confidence or happiness.

i've never understood meaningless hate and channeling so much energy and time into something so immature. i'm amused to say that more than one of the misguided ladies who bullied me out of their own sadness and emptiness are now young mothers. coincidence? i'll take this as a warning: never go down the vapid road of hate! don't bother being jealous; instead, vie for self-improvement. don't fill your life with meaningless noise just to cover up a real problem. i'd hate to end up in such a place.

right now, i'd say that i'm on a positive path: i love my family, i've developed some genuine friendships, i have a phenomenal man, i'm successful.. these are things that i didn't have to buy or force myself into for the convenience and comfort. hell, i was single for a damned year before me and Andy hooked up [no rebound, no desperation]. and if i ever find myself not liking a lady for whatever reason, i avoid her instead of wasting time and energy ranting about her--or i fix whatever is in myself that might make me jealous of her. because frankly, if i'm being the best person that i can be, then i can't view another woman as competition. how sad otherwise!

here are some quotes from Gala's article:

"Similar to the way in which if you’re happy with yourself & your life, you don’t trawl the internet being nasty, if you’re happy & have good self-esteem, you don’t view other girls as competition any more either."

and

"One thing I’ve noticed over the last few years is that if you’re really happy with yourself & your life, or if you become that way after years of self-loathing or misery, the way that you interact with other people & the world around you completely changes."

i've linked the whole thing in my title if you'd like to read it! it's a simple decision, really. waste your time being  jealous of another lady who didn't do shit to you, or improve yourself and grow up? you'd better hurry up and make the right choice before your bitter life hands you an ugly, doomed baby without a real father and a life full of government assistance.

this has been a bit sarcastic for sarcasm's sake, but the bottom line holds.